Still Waiting

Thursday, March 31, 2005

have been feeling kind of down recently.. don't know why actually.. pumpkin? school? i don't know.. really.. been missing prss very very much... to think that in the past i actually would say once that i wish to graduate from this school... and welcome the holidays alot... well definitely i was really really wrong.. feel like being in class once more.. so organised and so strictly being watched over, it is impossible to skip any lessons unless u're sick.. but jc... no one even cares. no one takes attendance in lecture halls. haiz... been getting restless.. too lazy to do anything.. the when it comes to going out with friends and going to prss, i'm all perked up. mad? u bet.

hmm.. listening to songs like hui dao guo qu(jay), bcos i'm a girl (kiss), sad songs of FIR, n TONG HUA by guang liang.. will make me wanna cry.. cant believe i'm so WEAK. haiz. =( anyway, been missing pumpkin too much also.. i guess this is what that is draining all my energy away.. but i will never give up.. unless pumpkin does first. have to really pick myself up once more.

having tuition tmr..sian.. 8 pm.. well.. will be skipping tpjc co tmr and celebrating eddie's birthday.. =) but have to be home early to prepare for tuition..zzz... actually i quite enjoy teaching tuition, but i hate to get stuck. zzz...=( n its a nice feeling to get money too. but haven been saving it up. i'm sure sis will get mad at me for this, but i have no choice la.. to much to spend on..but too little money..i'll use my own money to buy the things i need den getting all from my mother... she has been doing housework cos i'm returning home late becos of practices and stuff... been feeling kinda guilty abt it.. gonna help her out during weekends. well if i dont, my sis will remind me of this blog entry.

haiz. been feeling really weird. PMS i guess. well.. haiz. =( some of my girlfriends in tpjc with me is getting really sot abt the guys there.. ya la.. looks above average lor.. but issit looks that counts all? haiz.. its the inner self.. in fact i rather like talking to avg looking guys cos i find them much better and happier to chat with.. well.. the chatting topics never runs out.. but pumpkin is always on my mind. been getting myself into such a bad state.. well.. ahhhh dunno la. =( just hope that i can be happier again, like the crazy n loud girl i used to be..but now.. during he long breaks, my friends, like today, watched guys running on the track.. the JC 2s having pe..but i'll be sitting in a corner, trying to complete my cross stitch quickly.. well, i wun deny i do look at guys sometimes, but pumpkin will always be first to be back to my head, so i find myself concentrating on lessons once more.. haiz.. pumpkin ar pumpkin. how i wished u are in the same sch n cls as me....

-when are you coming back? ;